I'm going to say first off, you never ever EVER need to stop venting to me. I'll be here through all of this and will help you out in any way I can. I know it's hard to believe sometimes, but I'll never not want to listen to you if you need someone. I promise.

I'm also going to say that the chest tightness and difficulty breathing and crying sounds like you're having panic attacks. It all sounds like depression, which I know you know, but I really do think talking to a doctor could help and I'm going to keep encouraging it until I sound like a broken record and you want to kick me, because you deserve to feel good about yourself. Work definitely isn't helping in that regard and I really hope something changes there soon. If you don't get the new position, I'll bug you to apply for new jobs and you can bug me, too.

A lot of what you've written sounds really familiar, especially with feeling like a burden on Adam and wanting to be liked. I honestly don't know what changed for me, but I know how hard that can be. How hard it can be just to remind yourself that the people in your life really do want you around and that it's okay if not everyone likes you. It's SO hard, I know it is. I just... I hear you on that.

I'm only one person, but I love you and you're stuck with me. <44444444 If you ever need anything, tell me. I'll always do whatever I can.